Tuesday, 5 February 2013
round and round
When love was new and we were young, we did things differently, without as much concern. Together we were playful and mischievous, as if our protons and atoms that made us were firing off into all new directions. The things we could get each other to do. One day we were out driving my father's car, an old Sigma, from Bayview to the beach. On the way back we decided to see how many times we could drive around the main roundabout at Mona Vale. While "A Solid Bond In Your Heart" by Style Council was blaring out of the speakers, we drove round and round. It was a tight roundabout and it took a lot of concentration to keep on the right angle, we watched as cars wanting to turn in watched us keep going around and around, 3, 4, 5 times, then 6,7,8 & 9 times. It was dizzying as some cars came and went as they came in from the 4 turning lanes into the roundabout. I think we counted up to 20 times, we lost count as we finally turned off and zoomed up the road. I think we may have even told dad what we did and he just said something like "you cheeky buggers", "I won't be able to show my face around there now". Another day he busted us pushing each other around in shopping trolleys (very nearly toppling out as i hit a gutter) in the main street in the late summer evening sun after we came back from eating and drinking out.
Monday, 4 February 2013
Salute the old boys
Old Catholic private high school traditions and ceremonies have stood the test of time. There was one small tradition that I remember well and one that we twisted for our own amusement. At the monthly school assemblies, we would sing the national anthem, sing the school anthem and then salute the old boys (the old boys of the school).
There was a group of us in year 8, most of the year in fact (after word had got around) that wanted to subvert this tradition at the next assembly and instead of looking at the flag and saluting it, we would look downwards towards our own old boys (our balls) and salute them and the work they do for us (boys in year 8, there was plenty of work for them). We all thought we were hilarious and that this would be the greatest assembly ever.
The day loomed and then was upon us. There was a general murmur around our year group as we collected at our year's lines in the assembly area. Most of the year were in on this subversion and we were all waiting with youthful anticipation. The time that the principle was going to ask us to salute the old boys was looming, it was sunny day the sun was shining down upon the assembled throng.
The principal uttered the words "Now it's time to salute the old boys". I was already smiling, almost laughing as I looked down towards the ground and my old boys and did a hearty salute as I could sense all the other boys in my year doing the same. The other year groups were also wondering what was happening at this stage and a few of us broke up with laughter at our antics. Executed perfectly and long remembered, our youthful twist on this old tradition.
There was a group of us in year 8, most of the year in fact (after word had got around) that wanted to subvert this tradition at the next assembly and instead of looking at the flag and saluting it, we would look downwards towards our own old boys (our balls) and salute them and the work they do for us (boys in year 8, there was plenty of work for them). We all thought we were hilarious and that this would be the greatest assembly ever.
The day loomed and then was upon us. There was a general murmur around our year group as we collected at our year's lines in the assembly area. Most of the year were in on this subversion and we were all waiting with youthful anticipation. The time that the principle was going to ask us to salute the old boys was looming, it was sunny day the sun was shining down upon the assembled throng.
The principal uttered the words "Now it's time to salute the old boys". I was already smiling, almost laughing as I looked down towards the ground and my old boys and did a hearty salute as I could sense all the other boys in my year doing the same. The other year groups were also wondering what was happening at this stage and a few of us broke up with laughter at our antics. Executed perfectly and long remembered, our youthful twist on this old tradition.
EastSide radio
There was a time and a place where we lived through this other fad. As mere mortals, we tend to live through these phases, or fads in our lives. We consume, eat, play, change and move on to the next thing. This was a really interesting and fun different fad we had for a time. We lived in a unit, we called Amorous Amaroo, right by the ocean, in a lovely little bay, we enjoyed sea breezes through our windows and the sound of crashing waves all day and night. At first it was unnerving, it felt too loud this sound of waves and tide crashing, moving around, it seemed loudest at night, when the ocean woke up and everything else went to sleep. A station was found on the FM band, it played jazz music that seemed to provide a matching carefree soundtrack to our lives. The presenters talked between tracks and invited listeners to ring in and send in poetry and prose. We particpated, we sat out on the rocks by the sea to listen and ring in. My wife rang in with a Woody Allen quote "Sex is like bridge, if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand". Which we thought was funny and great. Other times, we made up poems and laughed at our literary pretensions. We laughed and made fun of others that rang in, life's waif's and strays, drunk, bored, drugged, all unedited, unrestrained on this EastSide radio. Other's would be going out large on their Saturday night, we were content with our night in with EastSide and joked we were getting old and less easily pleased for our entertainment and fun. I can look back now with such nostalgic fondness, perhaps we had it all then, that was all we needed, we picked up something on the airwaves that carried us away to another place & time, simplicity in concert with our location and lives. We on the Northside tuned in and dropped out for EastSide radio.
Saturday, 2 February 2013
Sunday stories - Live
Story live from the North side. I don't usually do 3 blog posts in a day, but this is an exception.
Just now, I was in the kitchen about to do the washing up and smelt what appeared to be burning toast or waffles. The smell was getting more pronounced and then an alarm went off, from nearby, downstairs perhaps. My wife and I rushed down and were looking for the unit the alarm was coming from. It ended up being the one directly underneath ours, smoke coming through the kitchen and bathroom windows, more pronounced from the kitchen. My son's friend came down to and noticed a women asleep on the lounge in the unit. There were other neighbour's gathering around as well. The gay neighbour from the other downstairs unit and I were trying to wake the women on the lounge. I started yelling "Wake up, Wake up". To no avail. She wasn't stirring a bit. I then yelled at the top of my lungs "fire, fire!" also to no avail. I said to the neighbour, "do you think she might have taken something", to which he nodded.
My son's friend thought of a brilliant idea to try to turn the stove off, using a long pole outside the flat. He grabbed it and was poking through the window to the stove and managed to turn it off. The smoke was very thick, what seemed the whole flat but much worse in the kitchen area. As were coming around the back, he noticed the barred window, the barring was loose and managed to pry it open. He said "Who wants to go in" and I said, "You go in and open the door and wake her up". He jumped in, nothing like youth on your team in an emergency. I went around to the front door and there was heaps of smoke coming out of the unit and the door was open, other neighbours were already in there to, my sons friend was trying to get her awake, by shaking her. He came back out the front and said that she wasn't really waking up, he shook her and she just didn't appear with it.
One of the other neighbours a lady from next door managed to get her off the couch and was walking her out of the smokey unit. They walked past me and she appeared to be very sleepy and unaware of what was happening, they went out the front of the units. There were a lot of helpful and curious neighbours around now including the couple who live next to us on the 2nd floor and neighbours i have hardly ever seen from the unit next door.
The fire truck turned up and a tall fireman walked up casually and asked which unit and I pointed him to the ground floor unit and said "the kitchen is around to the left". The other fireman was out the front with the girl who fell asleep on the couch with the oven on, smoke everywhere, the alarm going off, neighbours yelling at her. She had an oxygen mask on and appeared to be recovering on the ground.
My wife and I said "Good work to my son's friend" as my son finally prised himself away from his Xbox and came down to see what all the fuss was about. My wife said that this neighbour would have been told by the real estate that she was being too noisy and given a warning and the landlord might have told her she has to move out. We always hear her in the early hours of the morning and into the night, she has a loud Canadian accent. We all went back up to our unit as the fuss was dying down. A little later the police turned up as well, most likely to question the neighbour. I couldn't remember what i was doing before all the action.. oh yeh, the washing up. Forget that! Let's go get a coffee instead.
Just now, I was in the kitchen about to do the washing up and smelt what appeared to be burning toast or waffles. The smell was getting more pronounced and then an alarm went off, from nearby, downstairs perhaps. My wife and I rushed down and were looking for the unit the alarm was coming from. It ended up being the one directly underneath ours, smoke coming through the kitchen and bathroom windows, more pronounced from the kitchen. My son's friend came down to and noticed a women asleep on the lounge in the unit. There were other neighbour's gathering around as well. The gay neighbour from the other downstairs unit and I were trying to wake the women on the lounge. I started yelling "Wake up, Wake up". To no avail. She wasn't stirring a bit. I then yelled at the top of my lungs "fire, fire!" also to no avail. I said to the neighbour, "do you think she might have taken something", to which he nodded.
My son's friend thought of a brilliant idea to try to turn the stove off, using a long pole outside the flat. He grabbed it and was poking through the window to the stove and managed to turn it off. The smoke was very thick, what seemed the whole flat but much worse in the kitchen area. As were coming around the back, he noticed the barred window, the barring was loose and managed to pry it open. He said "Who wants to go in" and I said, "You go in and open the door and wake her up". He jumped in, nothing like youth on your team in an emergency. I went around to the front door and there was heaps of smoke coming out of the unit and the door was open, other neighbours were already in there to, my sons friend was trying to get her awake, by shaking her. He came back out the front and said that she wasn't really waking up, he shook her and she just didn't appear with it.
One of the other neighbours a lady from next door managed to get her off the couch and was walking her out of the smokey unit. They walked past me and she appeared to be very sleepy and unaware of what was happening, they went out the front of the units. There were a lot of helpful and curious neighbours around now including the couple who live next to us on the 2nd floor and neighbours i have hardly ever seen from the unit next door.
The fire truck turned up and a tall fireman walked up casually and asked which unit and I pointed him to the ground floor unit and said "the kitchen is around to the left". The other fireman was out the front with the girl who fell asleep on the couch with the oven on, smoke everywhere, the alarm going off, neighbours yelling at her. She had an oxygen mask on and appeared to be recovering on the ground.
My wife and I said "Good work to my son's friend" as my son finally prised himself away from his Xbox and came down to see what all the fuss was about. My wife said that this neighbour would have been told by the real estate that she was being too noisy and given a warning and the landlord might have told her she has to move out. We always hear her in the early hours of the morning and into the night, she has a loud Canadian accent. We all went back up to our unit as the fuss was dying down. A little later the police turned up as well, most likely to question the neighbour. I couldn't remember what i was doing before all the action.. oh yeh, the washing up. Forget that! Let's go get a coffee instead.
little contraceptive
Not sure if I am proud of this one or not, but it was quite funny at the time and it is a good little addition to the blog, a quickie if you like.
When my son was very little around 1 year of age and I like most males that are new parents was finding the going a little tough, my sex life taking a major dive from pre-fatherhood times. This one day, I think my son was down for a nap and my wife had granted me permission for (what Flight of the Concords) would say, business time. However before we got anywhere the little ray of sunshine, was stirring. I was saying "just leave for a him bit, he might be okay and settle himself". My wife being a new mum and this being the first born, would have none of that. "We can't, there could be something wrong, he might have wind".
I in my frustration, just gave up and caved in without entering into any debate and just went and got him from his cot, brought him back into our bed, passed him to my wife lying in the bed and said very sarcastically. "Here is your little contraceptive". To which she was shocked and amused at the same time, she laughed and said "Oh, you can't call him that, that's mean". "I can't believe you said that". "It's true" I said. "He's the best little contraception going around".
When my son was very little around 1 year of age and I like most males that are new parents was finding the going a little tough, my sex life taking a major dive from pre-fatherhood times. This one day, I think my son was down for a nap and my wife had granted me permission for (what Flight of the Concords) would say, business time. However before we got anywhere the little ray of sunshine, was stirring. I was saying "just leave for a him bit, he might be okay and settle himself". My wife being a new mum and this being the first born, would have none of that. "We can't, there could be something wrong, he might have wind".
I in my frustration, just gave up and caved in without entering into any debate and just went and got him from his cot, brought him back into our bed, passed him to my wife lying in the bed and said very sarcastically. "Here is your little contraceptive". To which she was shocked and amused at the same time, she laughed and said "Oh, you can't call him that, that's mean". "I can't believe you said that". "It's true" I said. "He's the best little contraception going around".
Aussie quotes
He has said the funniest things over time, this Aussie I know, that I have to repeat them for others to enjoy these gems, pockets of wisdom. In relation to astronomy he had this revelation to save Earth from a near Armageddon like catastrophe from an incoming comet. "Throw a pinpoint at it".
He was one of the first to be breath tested (positive) during the day when the police started targeting daytime drink/drivers. He was interviewed by a current affairs program of the time and when the interviewer asked him what he thought of being the first to be caught for drink driving. He replied "What do you think, I am ashamed of myself".
When calling his daughter to dinner, he could be heard to say, when he was in a playful mood. "Steffo's want some din dins?"
When coming out of the toilet one day at home, he was heard to say in a serious voice. "God spoke to me". With the intent that he lift his game, get back on track and stop drinking so much.
This one he has been known to say to friends and family upon them coming over and him answering the door. "Go away, we don't want any".
When his partner was at the fridge bending over, he suggestively came up behind her and said "Just parking mumma"
One day he came to his grandson's door, when he was staying over and he just came out with "Magic word". He didn't know what to think when he said that, he was just looking at him strangely, when he then said "food". Meaning dinner was ready.
One his daughters was eating some greasy food one day on the couch when she was younger and he saw her wiping her greasy fingers on the lounge and said to her "don't wipe your fingers on the couch". She replied, "I wasn't". He then said, "yes you were". "You were using it as sweeping bowl".
He was one of the first to be breath tested (positive) during the day when the police started targeting daytime drink/drivers. He was interviewed by a current affairs program of the time and when the interviewer asked him what he thought of being the first to be caught for drink driving. He replied "What do you think, I am ashamed of myself".
When calling his daughter to dinner, he could be heard to say, when he was in a playful mood. "Steffo's want some din dins?"
When coming out of the toilet one day at home, he was heard to say in a serious voice. "God spoke to me". With the intent that he lift his game, get back on track and stop drinking so much.
This one he has been known to say to friends and family upon them coming over and him answering the door. "Go away, we don't want any".
When his partner was at the fridge bending over, he suggestively came up behind her and said "Just parking mumma"
One day he came to his grandson's door, when he was staying over and he just came out with "Magic word". He didn't know what to think when he said that, he was just looking at him strangely, when he then said "food". Meaning dinner was ready.
One his daughters was eating some greasy food one day on the couch when she was younger and he saw her wiping her greasy fingers on the lounge and said to her "don't wipe your fingers on the couch". She replied, "I wasn't". He then said, "yes you were". "You were using it as sweeping bowl".
Friday, 1 February 2013
Stephen, not his real name
Stephen was a friend we would see out and about, in the city, in the clubs. I can't remember who met him first, my half Italian girlfriend at the time or me. Possibly while we were both together, he was an unusual guy, he had his own style and way, I would describe him as maybe a mix between hipster ( before they existed) and a hobo. He was tall and lean and rough around the edges, very much his own person with his own unique take on life. He had heaps of energy and could just talk and talk. He told us he was a manic depressive and was on medications for it. I didn't know to much about it, other than my dad was diagnosed with it when I was around 16. Most nights when we saw him out and hung out for a while he was manic, to my eyes anyway and he just seemed like a guy with boundless enthusiasm for life but with problems and issues that could surface anytime. I wondered at the time, if he was also taking other drugs as he seemed very up and down. There was probably a time when I noticed that he was probably hanging around us a little too much and I was a little suss that there was something going on between Julia and him.
We had probably been going out a year or more at this stage and things were not that great anyway. She lived too far away and we both lived at home and would only see each other on nights out. I didn't have my own car and it was hard to find alone time. Our alone time sometimes consisted of having wild sex in the toilet of a club or in a station toilet or on the train platform itself. Often when she would go home on a train from the city I would still go out and often get with other girls. I kind of knew she was doing the same, there was one time that she had this thing for a guy who was studying medicine and it was very disconcerting. It's hard to watch the one you like have this kind of adoring puppy love for someone and being all flirtatious in front of you. A friend at the time, was living on the same train line as her and one night he told me on the way home they started kissing. I knew things were not well and should have ended our relationship sooner. I was surprised my friend did this to me as it wouldn't have been something I could have done to him. He did say that she initiated it and it wasn't something that he was that into, still didn't shy away from it, did he.
It came to a head one night when my girlfriend's parents had gone away for the weekend and I had booked a room in one of those dive hotels in the city, down the Chinatown end. We had gone out to a few clubs and ended up back at the hotel room with Stephen in tow. Not something I had wanted, and she was being a little cagey and Stephen was being vey manic. I just wanted some old fashioned booty time and was trying to get rid of our friend, who was great company and all, but,wasn't getting the obvious hint what the hotel room was for. The room was dark and small and the window looked out on a busy city street, it was a crowded room with just the 3 of us cramped inside. My girlfriend was saying she might go back to her home instead and would get the train with Stephen. I was feeling very non-plussed with that idea and said so. it's funny how in these situations you sense something's up before you really know for sure. I for whatever reason was putting up a fight this night and managed to convince her to stay and got rid of Stephen who was really getting on my nerves now. I felt like I still really didn't know this guy and that perhaps she knew him a whole lot more intimately than I did.
When he left at around 2am, we were alone in this darkened hotel room in the dark seedy side of town. The bed was quite small and narrow, we started making out on it and soon had our clothes off and were going for it. It felt like this,was near the end, because of that we were probably both not that into it it, or into it but elsewhere. We both had a love of music and clubbing, her song was Teardrops by Womack and Womack. "Teardrops in my eyes, next time I'll be true. Whispers in the powder room! She cries on every tune". Or " footsteps on the dance floor, remind me baby of you". She would always sy this song reminded her of me, before things started going bad.
The night I thought I was going to have wasn't the night I ended up having. We slept and when we awoke we went our separate ways, slinking out of the run down hotel into the lightness of day.
We had probably been going out a year or more at this stage and things were not that great anyway. She lived too far away and we both lived at home and would only see each other on nights out. I didn't have my own car and it was hard to find alone time. Our alone time sometimes consisted of having wild sex in the toilet of a club or in a station toilet or on the train platform itself. Often when she would go home on a train from the city I would still go out and often get with other girls. I kind of knew she was doing the same, there was one time that she had this thing for a guy who was studying medicine and it was very disconcerting. It's hard to watch the one you like have this kind of adoring puppy love for someone and being all flirtatious in front of you. A friend at the time, was living on the same train line as her and one night he told me on the way home they started kissing. I knew things were not well and should have ended our relationship sooner. I was surprised my friend did this to me as it wouldn't have been something I could have done to him. He did say that she initiated it and it wasn't something that he was that into, still didn't shy away from it, did he.
It came to a head one night when my girlfriend's parents had gone away for the weekend and I had booked a room in one of those dive hotels in the city, down the Chinatown end. We had gone out to a few clubs and ended up back at the hotel room with Stephen in tow. Not something I had wanted, and she was being a little cagey and Stephen was being vey manic. I just wanted some old fashioned booty time and was trying to get rid of our friend, who was great company and all, but,wasn't getting the obvious hint what the hotel room was for. The room was dark and small and the window looked out on a busy city street, it was a crowded room with just the 3 of us cramped inside. My girlfriend was saying she might go back to her home instead and would get the train with Stephen. I was feeling very non-plussed with that idea and said so. it's funny how in these situations you sense something's up before you really know for sure. I for whatever reason was putting up a fight this night and managed to convince her to stay and got rid of Stephen who was really getting on my nerves now. I felt like I still really didn't know this guy and that perhaps she knew him a whole lot more intimately than I did.
When he left at around 2am, we were alone in this darkened hotel room in the dark seedy side of town. The bed was quite small and narrow, we started making out on it and soon had our clothes off and were going for it. It felt like this,was near the end, because of that we were probably both not that into it it, or into it but elsewhere. We both had a love of music and clubbing, her song was Teardrops by Womack and Womack. "Teardrops in my eyes, next time I'll be true. Whispers in the powder room! She cries on every tune". Or " footsteps on the dance floor, remind me baby of you". She would always sy this song reminded her of me, before things started going bad.
The night I thought I was going to have wasn't the night I ended up having. We slept and when we awoke we went our separate ways, slinking out of the run down hotel into the lightness of day.
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